I am slowly but certainly losing it.
My ITB hurts (and I am starting to think that it will never stop), I do not like my new coach (or rather what he makes me do, or better what he does not make me do) very much, I cannot find a pool where I can swim (I already went to two different pools at three different times and everytime I turned on my heel and walked back home), my bike is a piece of garbage (too big for me, the bottom bracket makes horrible noises and rear wheel goes left ad right as if it was not even fastened to the frame and I am expecting it to fall apart any moment, I just hope I will be within walking distance to my place).
I know. Stop whining and do something about it! But WHAT????
Yes, I am going to keep looking for a pool, I am going to continue biking until I kill myself in a fall, I will part ways with CH.
But what am I supposed to do with that ITB? I know that I have not tried everything yet. I have not got MRI to see whether there is something wrong with soft tissues(because RTG looks good, no problem), I can have bursa removed surgically etc. But I do not think that I am serious enough athlete to have a surgery to fix it.
But you know what? I am starting to think that I should just bag this triathlon idea.
I am not at that point when you stop caring whether you complete a workout or not. I care. I care a lot. And since last 2 months were a complete disaster (and actually last year was a complete disaster running-wise) and it seems that it will continue being a disaster for at least next 2-3 months it is just making me frustrated.
Plus you cannot do triathlon without running, can you? So what's the point? I cannot run,I cannot train. And why the hell am I stressing myself? I do not need that? I honestly think that that ITB problem will never go away. Well, maybe it will, in a year or two. But I do not want to wait for years. I do not like thinking long-time.
My life would be so much easier if I did not have to stress every single day that once again I am not able to get a run in, a swim in, a decent bike workout in. I just do not know how to do it without putting my whole myself into it, without commitment, without getting better and better, without decent results.
I also do not like what I am doing this year. I had a blast last year with bike/swim (and run when I was able to run). So far this year, not so much. It seems that nothing has structure, that I do not have anything (races, times etc) to shoot for, I have no paces/watts/HR to train by. Last year at least swim/bike has structure, but now everything seems very random. I know that it is not all CH's fault, at the moment this stupid pool and bike situation are behind it.
I realize that this does not make much sense, I tend to ramble and ramble and I have long ago lost the thread in this post.
So to summarize, I hate my training right not, and I do not think that I will be able to train properly in a near future because of my ITB. And it makes me super frustrated and stressed:(
Hurting in a different way
1 day ago